Popular - Edit

Popular
You're gonna be popular
I'll teach you the proper ploys when you talk to boys
Little ways to flirt and flounce, oh
I'll show you what shoes to wear, how to fix your hair
Everything that really counts to be

Popular
I'll help you be popular
You'll hang with the right cohorts, you'll be good at sports
Know the slang you've got to know
So let's start, 'cause you've got an awfully long way to go

Don't be offended by my frank analysis
Think of it as personality dialysis
Now that I've chosen to become a pal, a sister, and adviser
There's nobody wiser
Not when it comes to

Popular, I know about popular
And with an assist from me to be who you'll be
Instead of dreaming who you were, well, are
There's nothing that can stop you
From becoming popular ('lar)

La-la, la-la
We're gonna make you popular

When I see depressing creatures
With unprepossessing features
I remind them on their own behalf to think of
Celebrated heads of state
Or especially great communicators
Did they have brains or knowledge?
Don't make me laugh

They were (popular), right
It's all about popular
It's not about aptitude, it's the way you're viewed
So it's very shrewd to be
Very, very popular like me

And though you protest
Your disinterest
I know clandestinely
You're gonna grin and bear it
Your new-found popularity (ah)

La-la, la-la
La-la, la-la
La-la, ooh
You'll be popular
Just not quite as popular as me